Benwahwah wrote:Here is my honest opinion.
If you aren’t concerned that she will have a negative impact on the children then I think it is beneficial for them to be able to spend more time with their mum. However, I would look to keep the overall control in one place, bouncing from home to home on what sounds like a totally 50/50 basis that you’re suggesting would probably be quite disruptive. I think a better solution would be to give your ex more access on the weekends and through the holidays. This is the setup my brothers wife has with her ex. My brothers daughter spends every other weekend with him, and 50% of school holidays with him.
If you do make any changes, make sure they are written into the court order. My brother and his wife tried to be lenient with her ex, then all of a sudden he was going to court trying to claim full custody, and saying that the current agreement was different to the court order. Thankfully the courts told him to fuck off with his vexatious bullshit, but you need to make sure you are covered just in case.
Well thats great advice, the issue is that parents here are more or less assumed to to have a right to 50% access unless you can demonstrate one or more of the following;
- Abusive behaviour towards the child/ren, other parent or other family member by either parent (I was able to demonstrate this - but on paper she has taken the steps I asked to address this behaviour so the onus is ultimately on me to prove that the kids are at risk)
- The distance between the parents homes and or school is too great for regular hand overs. (there's 4 blocks between us or about a 5 min drive, 15 min walk)
- Drug or alcohol abuse by either parent this includes recreational marijuana use but not social drinking (lol). (hehehehe!)
- The wishes of the children. (My kids now want to spend more time with mum, who can blame them)
Thoughts now considering the presumption that the children get 50/50 time with each parent?